last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
