Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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