I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize