what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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