You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize