I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
