Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
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