all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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