Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
