fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
