So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize