He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
