problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
