The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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