It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
