Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
We are all done wearing pants today
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
