She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
