Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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