Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
