I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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