I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
