Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You can't just leave with hair like that
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.