Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize