You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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