Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
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four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
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So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize