people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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