the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
