Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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