she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
