There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
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