I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize