I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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