I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
