He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
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I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
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Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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