the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
We have started to decorate penises.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
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