I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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