this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
