i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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