i was rollin on her like bob the builder
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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