worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
