i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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