JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
