I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
