i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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