No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize