Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
