Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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