So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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