Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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