Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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