am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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